Thursday, July 29, 2010

Negativity and Loss of strength

It seems we live in a day and age where people have either forgotten about or have not learned how, to be positive. We have been given more than any other people at any other time in history. Yet we seem to be the most unhappy people ever created. In this country, we don't have to deal with heat/cold. Most of us (even those of us that are "poor") have heat and a/c in our house to mitigate the outside temp. We have so many choices of "tasty" foods to choose from, that making healthy choices is becoming difficult. We can choose whom we will be, with whom we associate, where we will go, where we will live and what we will do with our lives. Yet, for all this, we only seem to be able to see what is wrong, not all that is right.

What set this rant off is that I've had a day where I received one too many negative emails and I wondered if you are as tired of negativity in general and specifically negative emails as I am? I just sent this out to my friends in hope that they will take it to heart. Thought some of you want to send something in a similar vein to those whom are negative in your life.

"Dear Friends,

As most of you know, right now my life is in shambles. The last of my kids has moved out, ending child support. My job is ending the last of Aug. which means I will have no more income at that time. I just got word that they will have to move me to a one bedroom apt (from the 4 bedroom house I'm in) - most probably NEXT WEEK. (just found out 2 days ago about the probable change in address). The economy is in the cesspool and jobs are scarce. Add to that, I can not stand all day at a checkout line or fast food place, so finding a job in this tourist town is going to be problematic. What few jobs are available, go to family and I have no extended family to rely on. I'm also fighting to keep from becoming depressed at these unwanted changes in my life. Trying to keep a positive attitude in the face of this much opposition can be challenging, but depression doesn't solve anything. It only stops progress and can debilitate you. It's one of Satan's tools. So, I'm trying to maintain a positive attitude.

I'm looking at many different avenues of income, but nothing is going to be a "quick fix". I am, however, working on my future by attending employment workshops, self-employment workshops and webinars sponsored both by my church (LDS) and other people to learn what I need to know to advance my business knowledge. I have people who have offered to help with some of the missing knowledge I need in exchange for using the skills they've taught me to teach others. I'm doing the research I need to do to create my business. I'm looking at a variety of opportunities to work from home (ones that aren't scams.) And I'm looking at selling off many of my possessions to raise money to pay for the business start-up - or at least downsize my stuff so it fits into a shoe box one-bedroom apt. And I have less than a month to get ALL of this done. Yeah, it's scary and I do NOT like "change" - especially changes forced upon me.

Dealing with the emotions that are generated by all of this, plus finding the energy to DEAL with all of this is becoming a real challenge. Truth is, I'd rather just stick my head under the covers and cower. However, that's not an option. Well, not a HEALTHY option because at the end of Aug, my situation would be worse for having ignored it. The choice of handling it now when it's medium-sized or waiting until it's a giant, is one I have to make. Now is better than later, so upward and onward!

However, the last thing I need is more negativity in my life and here is where YOU come in:

In the last 4 hrs, I've received 8 negative emails about this or that problem in the US/world. The day is not over yet, and am sure I will receive more of these email.
For the record:
I agree, the government is in the pits.
I agree that Pres. Obama should never have been elected, that he is a Muslim & Socialist.
I agree that we are being sold out - and that is an optimistic outlook.
In general, I agree the country is going to heck in a hand-basket. BUT THERE'S NOTHING I CAN DO ABOUT IT. OR YOU, FOR THAT MATTER!!! (except VOTE them OUT if you don't like them. However, they're not up for election.)
I agree there's a HUGE problem with immigration.
I agree people are tampering with the vaccines.
In fact, I probably agree with 99% of the positions you favor.

HOWEVER, the endless passing around of petitions and negative emails do not DO ANY GOOD. Nobody that CAN change things is READING the "petition" you've signed. Why NOT? Because you can not verify the petition signatures, so that is WHY no one is paying any attention to them! (How do they know if someone has signed the petition 3 times instead of once? How do they know if the "signatures are from "live" people or dead/made-up people?) If passing these things around WORKED, the problem(s) would have been solved by now and certainly, I would pass them on. If passing them on MADE A DIFFERENCE in even ONE life, I'd pass them on. But they DON'T! These types of emails simply make US more unhappy because of the negativity in them.

Now, if you want to pass negative stuff to your other friends and they don't mind receiving it (or do they and they've just not said anything to you?), then keep passing it on to THEM. However, the truth of it is that when you send it on to your friends, you're "preaching to the choir"! The people to whom you send this stuff believe as you do or you wouldn't be sending it to them! I have friends who think the sun rises and sets in the current administration. Do I pass ANYTHING that is contrary to that opinion on to them? NO, they would be offended. I know this, so why would I do it. Why would YOU do it. don't. See what I mean?

I'm begging each of you to Cease and Desist with the negativity. As the 13th Article of Faith states:
"We believe in being honest, true, chaste, benevolent, virtuous, and in doing good to all men; indeed, we may say that we follow the admonition of Paul—We believe all things, we hope all things, we have endured many things, and hope to be able to endure all things. If there is anything virtuous, lovely, or of good report or praiseworthy, we seek after these things."

It seems to me that the people who pass on the negative things, tend to be people whom are unhappy with their own lives. All negativity does is make us MORE unhappy with our lot in life. It does NOT change a thing! It does not BUILD people UP (us or others), especially those that get a steady dose of it. Instead, it makes us feel aggressive, powerless, frustrated and downright angry. Good feelings for making the Spirit go bye-bye. And then how can we make a righteous decision without the influence of the Holy Spirit in our lives? We can not!

I LOVE FUNNY emails. I need to laugh, we all do. I like CLEAN jokes. I even get a chuckle over clean political jokes. My problem is only with the "pass them on" emails; the "President (congressman, government, etc)is ____, doing___" send this on to your entire email lists, type emails. I've gotten to the point of just deleting them all and I'm about to get to the point of blocking certain people again.

I would also like you to take under consideration that if you've got problems/trials/heartache of your own, you request YOUR friends/family to quit sending YOU the negative stuff. What does it help? NOTHING! What does it DO? It pulls you down and saps both the energy you need and the Spirit, from your own life and the life of people who have to filter out the negative stuff you send. In other words, it DOES not improve ANYONE'S happiness. It does NOT LIFT anyone up. Not the people whom sent it to you, not you, nor the ones you pass it on too. It DESTROYS happiness, contentment and positive energy. And, hummmm....what is one of Satan's titles? Oh, yeah, DESTROYER! So when we pass on negativity, in any of it's forms, for whom are we actually working? Yep, Satan. Do you REALLY want to be associated with HIS team? I know I don't! So do you REALLY want to keep sending those on? Do you REALLY even want them sent to YOU?

So again, if you're reading this, please stop with the NEGATIVE emails. Funny ones, inspirational one are GREAT! I LOVE those, I NEED those. They BUILD me up. They make me SMILE. They CALM my troubled heart and mind. They give me HOPE. They remind me I'm not alone in the world and that our Father in Heaven is the one who is REALLY in control - though I do have to do my part in my personal "plan of salvation" to be doing what He would have ME be doing, where He would have ME to be. That's where the "study it out in your mind, pray over it, burning/uneasiness in bosom comes in. Only to feel the Spirit, you have to be CALM. You can't be calm when reading negative things.

Thank you for your love and friendship."

So now my blog friends, our assignment for today is: BE POSITIVE. BE THANKFUL for what you DO have. DON'T WORRY about/FOCUS on, what you DON'T have. NO ONE had EVERYTHING they want, because there's always something more to "want". But most of us DO have WHAT WE NEED. Focus on how grateful we are that there's plenty of food to eat, that we can afford a home - no matter how humble it may be. That we have drinkable water, mostly safe streets and mostly good neighbors. That we live in a country that is still free.

I'm not suggesting we ignore problems. It's one thing to learn about problems and then figure out possible solutions. But there are some problems we CAN NOT SOLVE at our level. So make wise choices at election times - or run for office yourself. Then leave it ALONE. If you've DONE what you CAN do, then THERE'S NOTHING ELSE YOU CAN DO! So leave it in the hands of a loving Father in Heaven.

Remember the "Serenity Prayer":

God, grant us the...
Serenity to accept things we cannot change,
Courage to change the things we can, and the
Wisdom to know the difference
Patience for the things that take time
Appreciation for all that we have, and
Tolerance for those with different struggles
Freedom to live beyond the limitations of our past ways, the
Ability to feel Your love for us and our love for each other and the
Strength to get up and try again even when we feel it is hopeless.

Proverbs 3 (KJV):
My son, forget not my law; but let thine heart keep my commandments:
2 For length of days, and long life, and peace, shall they add to thee.
3 Let not mercy and truth forsake thee: bind them about thy neck; write them upon the table of thine heart:
4 So shalt thou find favour and good understanding in the sight of God and man.
5 Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding.
6 In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths.


LizBeth said...


You've got what it takes. My husband says it's not the change that really gets you down, it's the transition from what is to what will be. We've been through it several times, too. One thought that helped me through the last "great adventure" was this: Something might actually go right and turn out BETTER.

And you are sure right about those petitions! Yikes. The "email harvesters" are the only ones to benefit -- like anybody needs any more spam. I finally started blocking addresses to get a little peace.

Keep us posted. I'm praying for you.

Darlene said...

I know for a fact that things will be better!

You have a wise husband because he's right, it IS the transition that is the problem. For me, sometimes it's figuring out what I need to do to get through the transition that causes me such grief. There's no one here I can bounce things off of, so all decisions are mine alone to make. Sometimes that's good and sometimes it's difficult. I'm just thankful I have more of a safety net under me than many people do. At least I have Church resources so I know I won't be living on the street or starving. But I try to be as independent as possible and I want to be - and should be, taking care of myself.

LizBeth said...

Hey! How's the moving and job hunting going?

Sheena Simpson said...

Hi there. I was "blog surfing" and happened upon yours.I read this entry and thought you must have a lot of passion. I then read further and loved your chili recipes, fabulous. can't wait to read more of your entries.

LizBeth said...

Hope things are coming together now, getting everything unpacked and settled. Just wanted to let you know I'm thinking of you. ~Liz

LaRee said...

This email was so good to read! lol I kept getting emails from everyone I know, telling me to forward the email and microsoft would send us millions of dollars. Several things like that every day. I finally wrote up a big email pointing out all the pitfalls the writer had made and wondered at them why it got past any smart person..... I don't get those anymore... and a couple people even said thanks!